When I went to pick Gabe up at school today, I walked into his classroom and noticed a waft of what smelled like paint thinner rush past me.
What is that smell? I said looking around the room for wet paint.
Laura, Gabe's therapist, responded with, "They are tarring the roof of the building."
After ten minutes I started to feel nauseous.
"Maybe you should take him home," she said.
Wow. How did he make it through 2 1/2 hours of this? The therapists in his room looked peaked. Why didn't someone call me I wondered. When I thought some more, I realized that it was the higher powers that hadn't caught on to the intensity of the smell to close the school. The therapists don't make the judgment call about calling home, the director of the program does. She couldn't have called me if she wanted to.
So, I packed Gabe's bag and on our way out passed another mom.
"What's going on with this smell?" I asked.
"They [the higher powers] told the "principle" of our school to "take some Tylenol, it [ the smell] wasn't that bad." she said rolling her eyes.
"What?" "Who should I talk to about this?" "Maybe we should say something or write a letter." I started wondering about tomorrow and the fumes still being in his classroom.
"I guess you would just go down the hall."
Here's the catch all, Gabe's program is a program run under a much larger program that is the main umbrella for diagnosing all different disorders and learning disabilities. So, getting to the right person to talk to could end up being a long chain of command. I saw the majority of that chain today.
On my way out of Gabe's school, I directed Gabe down the hall to the main office.
I met the first person in the chain, the receptionist. Receptionists always seem to not get the credit they deserve. They maybe first in the chain, but really they are the most powerful. They decide whether he/she will make it easy or very difficult to get your questions answered. So, I always approach such power with caution and respect. I explained my situation with Gabe's school and the fumes and I wonder if there was someone I could talk to about reimbursement ( Gabe left school early) and whether or not they will be tarring the roof tomorrow. She didn't seem to know. So I asked if she had a number for someone who may know and I could just leave a message. Sounded good to me and she seemed perfectly OK to provide the information. She reached for a piece of paper, but I noticed something catching her eye off to the side where I couldn't see.
Then the door to the back office opens and there stands a woman who introduces herself, we'll call her Anastasia. We walk to her office, Gabe runs the other direction. I'm hoping when I catch him, at least I will be able to discuss my concerns in her office, which will contain my son.
But, I was surprised to see that she did indeed lead me to her office, where she sat down along with another person ,who was not introduced, and I was left to stand in the opening of her office. So, our meeting was not a "private" matter nor , from what I could tell, an important one. I began to explain that my son attended the program down the hall, that his classroom has a very strong smell similar to Paint thinner. I asked who I would address about reimbursement since I had to remove Gabe from class early, whether or not they would be tarring tomorrow, who would call and let me know and whether it would be at all possible if the roofers would be able to finish on the weekend or after school hours. Respectful and to the point.
This is what I got from the building manager... (mind you she never introduced herself, remained seated at her computer and only acknowledged me when she had a comment to make)
"First of all, " she began,"it does not smell that bad down there. I was just there and it was fine to me. We also have the smell in our offices."
I took a whiff. Nothing. There wasn't any smell here.
"You went to the classrooms today and you thought it smelled the same?" I wanted to clarify.
"The therapists that work with Gabe said it has been pretty strong for at least an hour or so." How could they argue with that?
"It hasn't. Only when they tar the sides of the building." Her attitude was worsening. I'll add that her office is on an inside wall away from any windows.
"Well," I added, "I know my son's therapists really well and I believe them when they tell me that the smell has been fairly strong for the majority of the morning." This woman was grating on my last nerve, but I kept my tone and responses respectful.
During this whole conversation, Anastasia, the women who brought me back to discuss my concerns reminded me of the parrot that sits on the shoulder of the pirate that repeats whatever is said.
"Bwaaaaack! No smell here. Bwaaaack! No smell here."
It was the office manager, Drisella, that had the "patch over her eye".
It went downhill from there, mostly on their part.
I stayed respectful, stuck to the three or four questions I had and wondered where it had gone wrong.
Finally, I stated that I was just concerned about my son, the smell was very strong in his room and I will need to be reimbursed.
I finished my side of the conversation with, "I don't appreciate the tone you are taking with me. I have heard enough." Then I left. What was the point of staying I thought. They obviously were not the people I needed to talk to.
I don't think they heard me, because Drisella kept talking and Anastasia sat perched on her shoulder as her right hand bird.
Gabe then took that as a sign to leave and run out to the waiting room where they had the coolest table with magnets. Upon reaching the table, I told him it was time to go. I then noticed that the room was full of people and it was quiet. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that they were all watching Gabe and I and had probably heard the conversation I had just minutes prior. We were in ear shot from the office of which I just left and was now praying to God that Gabe would grant me this one small ,humble wish to leave. His hands didn't move away from the magnets. Then, just out of the blue, he let go and walked out with me and my dignity.
The top person from Gabe's school caught up to me as I passed the door to Gabe's school and wondered if she could talk to me. Come to find out that there have been many "concerns"(complaints) about Drisella. She was wondering if I would be willing to explain what had happened on one of their comment forms that are discussed at their monthly meetings. Also she asked if I would also be willing to write a letter to the head of the entire program that is the umbrella over all the programs including Gabe's school.
Through all this I am left with some more thoughts and questions. the biggest one being WHY ME?????
The next, Why can't people just use common sense and thoughtfulness?
Why were they so defensive?
I know it wasn't all about me, then why did they take it out on me?
I just want to get along. I have been fighting all my life it seems. I just want to stop having to defend myself in order to get was is right and just or even what common sense would dictate as such. Ya know?
Oh, and here is my cool new 'do.
Ok, so I can't . Blogger has not let me post my own pictures for over a week now. The great 'do unveiling will have to wait.....
I figured out that without using a "layout", it works.
Here I am :o)
