I wonder that sometimes. It's funny to put myself and the word conservative even on the same page. An oxymoron. I get a silly picture of President Bush and I running through a field of daisies together laughing about oil prices, as dollar bills escape out of our pockets and drift slowly through the spring air.
That word also conjures up thoughts of Martha Stewart in her crisp linen shirts, stuffing a free range turkey at Thanksgiving, government and religion holding hands, and women being put "back in their place". So, how is it that I am when it comes to Autism?
Gabe's treatment has always been based on fact. Research that has been proven to be accurate. I love data in conjunction with ABA. Sounds weird, I know, but you could not get a clearer measure of progress. My husband agrees with this too. But, the chemical engineer in him also thinks that the data can be skewed by subjective evaluation. When you are evaluating outcomes that can be measured only subjectively, ABA Data is as accurate as you can get, in my opinion.
So, how does this all come together? Well, each Monday I look forward to my trea
sured half hour in the waiting room when Gabe goes to speech. My time to read. I sometimes browse through Oprah's "O", People or Budget Travel magazines. My time to escape into another world that ironically has little to do with Autism. Today, however,I chose to bring my new, almost finished book, Daniel Isn't Talking by Marti Leimback. A book about Autism that uses fictional characters created by someone who has an Autistic son. (Sometimes I just can not leave the world of Autism .) It has drama, a love story and a character that beats the odds. A great summer book. At least that's what I thought. Another woman, who waits in the room with me, I found, straddles both sides of the fence with ABA and biomedical approaches with her child. She asked me what I was reading. When I told her, she gave me a "look", then said "I don't read books like that. Mine are mostly resource, not fictional."
What is that supposed to mean? I could feel my eyes narrowing. Not only was she taking up my time to myself, but I believe she just insulted me.
Here's where it started. I should've stopped the conversation the minute it started, but felt like I would've been acting rude. Putting my book aside, she goes on and on, for the entire half hour lecturing me about biomedical treatments as if I needed her help. I must have had a look of desperation or one of being uneducated, not sure, because she thought I needed to be told about the needs that I have clearly overlooked with my son.
What was happening? I just wanted to read my book.
It was as if ABA was not acceptable on it's own. That's what gets me. I wanted to shout "IT"S A SPECTRUM!!!!" A spectrum with various degrees and means to treat. She left no room to get a word in edge wise. I was on the front lines with someone I didn't really know being lambasted about something I am not going to do with my son.
Now, I know many people that are treating biomedically, some are good friends, but my God, they are able to stand by their choices without shoving it down people's throats. I think it put me over the edge a bit, because it is as if we have the same conversation each Monday. It's one of those one sided conversations, I listen and she talks and talks. Normally, I don't mind to let a person who needs to vent, vent their thoughts to me. It's kind've like completing the circle for me, I talk my husband's ear off when he comes home and I in return become a good listener to someone else. A wonderful complete circle. The circle with this woman never makes a turn towards me, no give and take and lots of "Here,this is what you should be doing." Kind've a lecture series about what she thinks is best. I want to be supportive, but this week,
I JUST WANTED TO READ MY BOOK!
Any ideas?
